I woke this morning with the intention of going to church--for the second or third time this year. My attendance is more than just hit or miss. It's flat-out non existent. In a humble moment of honesty, I cannot remember the last time I attended a church service. In person, that is. I watch services online and there is this young preacher I follow...but that is another blog for another time.
At the risk of sounding hypocritical, I love the Lord with all of my heart, soul and mind. I read scriptures everyday. I read devotionals everyday. I send prayers to my friends via texts every morning. And they get testy when I don't. I spend time with and journal to God. Everyday, I surrender my will to His. Most times, several times a day, I make myself available to Him. I want to do His will. It's the least I could do after all He has done for me. From writing my stories and poems to typing the words on this blog, I ask God to direct me in His way. This morning is no different. Although I haven't finished my readings yet, I was prompted to get online and post this. I don't know why. But I am learning to follow the nudges when they are given. Although I don't follow all of the time, I thank God when I do. Because it means He is still talking to me even though I may not be listening.
I don't know why I struggle with going to church. I grew up in the church, was baptized at nine or ten. I sang in the choir, attended Sunday School and Sunday Service faithfully, and was in every church event. So what is the problem? I may never understand. As I stated in my previous post, all I need to know is the One who does understand. I love Him. I trust Him. And I will follow Him. He didn't promise us the easy road but He did promise us the road to eternal life.
So....you in?
Soli Deo Gloria,
Step Brown
As someone who grew up in church I totally understand where you are coming from. For me, I realized at some point that the majority of the people there were hypocrites. Saturday sinners/Sunday saints. So it turned me off. But you don't need church to have religion. Your belief should not be based on where you practice it. Not to mention, when you stop having someone tell you their interpretation of the bible and its scriptures you really start thinking about and understanding what they mean to you.
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